Taken For Granted

Success in your goals, whatever they may be will most likely involve others.  Whether we succeed or fail is largely a matter of how well we motivate others to get involved with us and OUR vision.

Success or failure in this is mainly a matter of relationships.  It is a matter of the kind of reaction to us by our family members, affiliates, non-profits, experts helping us, and even people we hope refer us to anyone that could be involved.  If this reaction is a good one we are likely to succeed.  If the reaction to us is a bad one, we are doomed.

The deadly sin in our relationships with people is that we take them for granted.  We do not make an active or continuous effort to do and say things that will make them believe in us, like us, and that will create in them the desire to work with us in the attainment of our goals.

5 things to ask yourself in order to win with people:

1. Readiness:  Are we prepared for relationships?
2. Connection:  Are we willing to focus on others?
3. Trust:  Can we build mutual trust?
4. Investment:  Are we willing to invest in others?
5. Synergy:  Can we create a win-win relationship?

Once you’ve decided that you are ready we need to focus on some good people principles to help us along.

The lens principle-Who we are determines how we see others.

The mirror principle-The first person we must examine is ourselves.

The hammer principle-  Hurting people, hurt people.

The pain principle-  Hurting people hurt people and are easily hurt by them.

The elevator principle-  We can lift people up or take people down in our relationships.

We will post more about these later.

Law Of The Shareholder

Successful sales people buy stock in themselves. Don’t think of yourselves as employees but rather the owner and CEO. This perspective will change the way we act and view our lives. This will lift our lid of limitations that we place on ourselves, by acting like an employee.

CEO mindset:  we see ourselves as the business owner with a compelling vision to help people with what we do each day. CEO’s take time to invest in themselves and utilize every minute.  They are concerned with quality,  results not just effort, while earning confidence and trust. 

Investments that help you buy stock in yourself:
1. Time with those you care about.
2. Personal development: What is the plan to take care of your best asset, yourself?  What areas need to be worked on and improved? Grow yourself and you will grow your business. How long are you in the coaching site per day? How many live trainings? Make sure to be at every advanced training. Pay attention to the experts. We will need coaching throughout our entire careers.
3. Watch every minute of your time and make sure you are not wasting them.  So many people communicate more things than is necessary, which takes time from them and others involved. Make sure your focus is on the goals at hand and that you are respecting the goals of those you are communicating with. Protecting your time will give you more time for other goals.
4. Focus on image. Look good and you will often feel good. You and your business must look good, friendly, and inviting.
5. Reinvest money in your business. The more the better. Many times people do not invest in their business as much or as long as a typical business person would.  Many should have a part time job just to be able to fund their business properly until it is self-sufficient.
6. Exercise. Health will bring wealth.

There are no short cuts. Invest as much and as often as you can in yourself.

Velvet Covered Bricks

As a child, when I misbehaved I was sure to receive “The Look” from my father.  I have vivid memories of the raised eyebrows and tense look.  It makes me shudder just to remember it.  “The Look” could cut right through my body and penetrate into my soul.  There was nothing comforting about “The Look”, and invariably it signaled forthcoming disciplinary measures.  “The Look” was to be respected, “The Look” was to be feared, and above all, “The Look” was to be avoided.

However, just as I can recall “The Look”, I also remember the tenderness of my father’s care after he reprimanded me. I remember his words of love for me.  I remember the warmth of his hug as he held me in his arms. I remember his tenderness as he gently explained why I had been disciplined and how I could learn from the experience.  He was not mean-spirited or severe in his discipline, rather his loving correction was intended to develop me into a man of character.

Leaders, like my father, must balance toughness and tenderness.  I like to call them Velvet-Covered Bricks. They are firm and strong on the inside, but soft and pleasant on the outside.

Some leaders are so tough they could chew nails, but their insensitivity prevents them from connecting with the people they lead. Ignorant of the emotions around them, they rely on authority and scare tactics to earn the respect from their team.

Other leaders go the extra mile to earn the admiration of those they lead.  They love to be seen as the “good guy,” and they are often soft on their team. To protect their popularity, they sacrifice healthy confrontation or neglect holding people accountable.

A Velvet-Covered Brick leader makes difficult decisions, but at the same time act as an emotional caretaker to the people their choices affect. They instill discipline, but they also provide encouragement and inspiration.

CONFRONT PROBLEMS BUT CONSIDER PERSPECTIVES

Velvet-Covered Brick leaders are not afraid to deal with conflict in order to iron out an unhealthy situation. By actively addressing problems, they are peacemakers as opposed to peacekeepers.  At the same time, such a leader remains open to the perspective of others.  Although supremely confident, a wise leader knows the fallibility of his or her judgment, and they turn an attentive ear to those who share differing opinions.

COMMITTED TO RESULTS AND COMMITTED TO RELATIONSHIPS

Leaders with a Velvet-Covered Brick mentality refuse to compromise goals or take the easy road out of tough spots. They relentlessly set the bar high so that the team achieves its potential. Yet, all the while, leaders value people just as much as productivity. They never sacrifice relationships simply to get results.

PROFESSIONAL AND PERSONAL

The Velvet-Covered Brick type of leader maintains an aura of professionalism at all times.  Such a leader stays poised in the most heated moments and keeps control of his or her emotions. While approachable, they reserve part of themselves (their fears, knowledge, insights) so that they can effectively motivate the team from a place of authority.

At the same time, leaders don’t want to come across as aloof, distant, or plastic.  The best leaders are warm, genuinely interested in their teammates, and are intentional in understanding what makes each person unique.  Additionally, to connect with the team they may selectively disclose information about themselves or even let down their emotional guard during any interaction.

TAKE CRITICISM AND SERVE THE CRITIC

Leaders who aspire to be Velvet-Covered Bricks develop thick skin and bypass the desire to retaliate against negative people.  Instead, they graciously accept criticism and welcome confrontation. Then, they take pains to win over their critics by reaching out to them. They go the extra mile to wade through conflict until a good solution that leads to the end goal can be reached.

RESPECTED AND APPROACHABLE

A leader earns respect on the basis of what he or she has done.  More often than not, respect is gained through what they have done through difficult times. Adverse circumstances test the mettle of a leader and show a leader’s true merit.

For a Velvet-Covered Brick leader, respect is balanced by approachability. An approachable leader has a consistent mood, is quick to forgive, willing to apologize, and shows authenticity. A leader at ease with himself puts others at ease.  Secure leaders aren’t constantly seeking validation from others, and because of that they are free to add value to those they lead, rather than trying to gain value from the approval of those around them.

People are drawn to leaders who value them. They will approach a leader who makes them feel encouraged, helps them grow, and treats them honestly.

Solid Foundation

Ability may get you to the top, but it takes character to stay there. To achieve our potential as a leader we need mental and moral strength. The leader must set the example. Physical conditioning is important, because without it we are less likely to get energy to fight for our beliefs, ideals, and standards. Often people who fall physically fall in more ways than just that. They fall in their work habits as well.

Our skills will constantly be improving. When we are through learning, we are through. You must seek to know everything you can and soak it up like a sponge. Dont only learn what you agree with, because if you already agree it is likely you are already doing it. The things that will improve our results will challenge us and be different from what we are doing now. My muscles beg out in pain as I push them harder. The harder I push the stronger they are, and the more weight they can carry without strain. We need  to execute quickly and correctly all aspects of where our focus is, not only parts of it. What are the systems that are in place to make sure we stay a life long learner and improve? It’s what you learn after you know it all that counts.

We need to be selfless. Sacrifice personal interest for the team. Good team spirit can increase productivity exponentially. What we put out there for our team and others will come back to us. Just like the farmer who plants the seeds reaps the harvest if cared for correctly.

We need to have poise and be true to ourself, not getting rattled, unbalanced, frustrated, regardless of the situation. Our poise is improved by having a solid foundation. You must earn the right to be confident and work hard to be solid. Our confidence comes from the knowledge that our preparation and work ethic is complete. Knowing we have done all things possible to prepare ourselves for the task.

Deep inside most success stories is a will for greatness.  There is a love for the hard battle, not the easy no result approach. Knowing that through this effort,  we are giving ourselves a true opportunity to live the lives we’ve dreamed of. When the going gets tough the tough get going.

All of this has to be founded in our faith of the future. Accomplishing big goals and dreams takes time. If difficult goals could be accomplished quickly, more people would be achievers. Genius is nothing but an aptitude for patience. Success is ALWAYS attainable when defined correctly, and provided with the effort to do the best you are capable of.

Change It

Whatever problem you seem to be encountering, we need to change it around. That problem is centered around our actions, which are created ultimately by our beliefs and thinking.  We have to change our old thinking, and push the negative thoughts out of the way.  Replace them with good things by learning and focusing on new ideas. Once the beliefs are solid, the right action must be put in to achieve the desired result. We need to perform this action over and over so it becomes our new routine.

Many people focus in on a lot of different things. What is most important to you at this time? You may have to get rid of some good things in order to get your best.

People need to be reminded more than they need to be instructed.

Growth

YOU ARE ROCKING!  However, you may not have enough leads or are making enough dials. That is what we always have to come back to when there are not enough good new people started. You will have many good short term motivators, but the reality is you’ll be doing double the personal volume you are now and you still won’t be at your “BEST.”  Let it come naturally and don’t stress about it.  Make sure that you know it should grow higher and will grow higher than it is now. Many people make a choice deep down, that they are doing fine now and stop themselves from growing as fast. They want to feel like they are doing “fine” because they are trying to protect their self-esteem and not feel like a failure.  If we looked at it in a healthier manner, we would realize that when we expect more out of ourselves, it will improve our self-esteem and change our lives for the better. When we realize we can grow into whatever we want to be, why would we ever want to protect a level of growth that is not consistent with our goals and desires for ourselves and the world.  We should be more than happy with where we are today, while living in full excitement and anticpation for improving with each moment.

Basic Steps

Can achievement be broken down into steps?  Well, it isn’t always that clean and easy, but I do know that those who achieve great things usually go through much of the same process, with many of the items listed below as part of that process.  So if you have been struggling with achievement, look through the following and internalize the thoughts presented. Then begin to apply them, and you will be on the road to achieving your dream!

1. Dream it - Everything begins in the heart and mind. Every great achievement began in the mind of one person. They dared to dream, to believe that it was possible. Take some time to allow yourself to ask “What if?”  Think big.  Don’t let negative thinking discourage you. You want to be a “dreamer.” Dream of the possibilities for yourself, your family, and for others. If you had a dream that you let grow cold, re-ignite the dream!  Fan the flames.  Life is too short to let it go.

2. Believe it - Yes, your dream needs to be big. It needs to be something that is seemingly beyond your capabilities, but it must also be believable. You must be able to say that if certain things take place, if others help, if you work hard enough, though it is a big dream, it can still be done. Good example: A person with no college education can dream that he will build a 50 million-dollar a year company. That is big, but believable. Bad example: That a 90 year-old woman with arthritis will someday run a marathon in under 3 hours. It is big alright, but also impossible. She should instead focus on building a 50 million-dollar a year business! And she better get a move on!

3. See it - The great achievers have a habit. They “see” things. They picture themselves walking around their CEO office in their new 25 million-dollar corporate headquarters, even while they are sitting on a folding chair in their garage “headquarters.” Great free-throw shooters in the NBA picture the ball going through the basket. PGA golfers picture the ball going straight down the fairway. World-class speakers picture themselves speaking with energy and emotion. All of this grooms the mind to control the body to carry out the dream.

4. Tell it - One reason many dreams never go anywhere is because the dreamer keeps it all to himself. It is a quiet dream that only lives inside of his mind. The one who wants to achieve their dream must tell that dream to many people. One reason: As we continually say it, we begin to believe it more and more. If we are talking about it then it must be possible. Another reason: It holds us accountable. When we have told others, it spurs us on to actually do it so we don’t look foolish.

5. Plan it - Every dream must take the form of a plan. The old saying that you “get what you plan for” is so true. Your dream won’t just happen. You need to sit down, on a regular basis, and plan out your strategy for achieving the dream. Think through all of the details. Break the whole plan down into small, workable parts. Then set a time frame for accomplishing each task on your “dream plan.”

6. Work it - Boy, wouldn’t life be grand if we could quit before this one! Unfortunately the successful are usually the hardest workers. While the rest of the world is sitting on their couch watching re-runs of Gilligan’s Island, achievers are working on their goal - achieving their dream. I have an equation that I work with: Your short-term tasks, multiplied by time, equal your long-term accomplishments. If you work on it each day, eventually you will achieve your dream. War and Peace was written, in longhand, page by page.

7. Enjoy it - When you have reached your goal and you are living your dream, be sure to enjoy it. In fact, enjoy the trip too. Give yourself some rewards along the way. Give yourself a huge reward when you get there. Help others enjoy it. Be gracious and generous. Use your dream to better others. Then go back to number 1,  and dream a little bigger this time!

Leadership

There are two essential qualities of leadership. Jack Welch, former CEO of General Electric says that the “Reality Principle” is the most important of all. What this means is the practice of realism in all things. The realist insists upon seeing the world as it really is, not as he wishes it were. This objectivity, this refusal to engage in self-delusion, is a mark of the true leader. Those who exhibit the quality of realism do not trust to luck, hope for miracles, pray for exceptions to basic business principles, expect rewards without working, or hope that problems will go away by themselves. These all are examples of self-delusion, of living in a fantasyland.The motivational leader insists on seeing things exactly as they are and encourages others to look at life the same way. As a motivational leader, you get the facts, whatever they are. You deal with people honestly and tell them exactly what you perceive to be the truth. This doesn’t mean that you will always be right, but you will always be expressing the truth in the best way you know how.

The second key quality of motivational leadership is responsibility. This is perhaps the hardest of all to develop. The acceptance of responsibility means that, as Harry Truman said, “The buck stops here.” The game of life is very competitive. Sometimes, great success and great failure are separated by a very small distance. In watching the play-offs in basketball, baseball, and football, we see that the winner can be decided by a single point, and that single point can rest on a single action, or inaction, on the part of a single team member at a critical part of the game.Life is very much like competitive sports. Very small things that you do, or don’t do, can either give you the edge that leads to victory or take away your edge at the critical moment. This principle is especially true with regard to accepting responsibility for yourself and for everything that happens to you.

Dynamite vs. Seed

When people get involved in home business, they are typically looking to make some positive changes in their lives.  Each of us want different things, but often these changes revolve around more money, more time, freedom, giving more to others, more purpose in our lives, equity, residual, higher self-esteem, personal growth, and the list goes on and on. 

 All are worthy pursuits, and we want them fast.  Sometimes so fast that we look at the business as a stick of dynamite that is designed to blow up our old problems and our old self and recreate the new things we want, in one massive explosion. 

The reality is home business is not a stick of dynamite but more like a seed.  A seed that if taken care of properly will provide all of those things listed above and more.  Just like a seed, we often underestimate the power and impact it can have at the beginning.  It looks so small, so lifeless.  With investment of water and sun, care and love, that seed will turn into something that will not only last for a long long time but is able to multiply into others. 

 Make sure you are raising your business in the proper manner, and that you are not here only for a quick fix dynamite style.  Instead, get ready to grow this seed into everything you’ve ever dreamed of and more!!!